Understand each other well, then go your separate ways.
Two people who connect deeply. Once you start talking, you can go astonishingly far in. Still, while the two of you are together, not much tends to move.
ENFP and INFP compatibility in brief (love, work, friendship)
ENFP × INFP is the Extinguishment relation, one of the sixteen. Understand each other well, then go your separate ways.
LoveA good combination at the entrance. It stalls over when to move and when to let go.WorkIt runs if you split into the one who widens and the one who stays.Friends & conversationTalking deeply alone together is the best scene.
Written as INFP × ENFP it is the same pair. In 16Personalities terms, the Campaigner and the Mediator.
Talk about what is in the air needs no preamble. At this point it cannot be told apart from the relation that meshes best.
But the emphasis differs. ENFP brings world after world and moves on just as one gets deep. INFP holds the same story for years and stays. Both are right, so it does not become a conflict, and every time it becomes an argument over staying or moving.
Each sees in the other the side they suppress in themselves. ENFP sees silence and stillness in INFP; INFP sees lightness and the speed of letting go in ENFP. ENFP's breadth shrinks a little; INFP's depth grows a little shallower.
ENFP toward the next topic; INFP deeper into the same one.
Half the invitations come to nothing
Alone together it got through, but once people enter, each tries to push their own way of feeling through. INFP withdraws first, a sulk creeping into their tone. ENFP feels pigeonholed and changes the subject. Back to two, it is as it was.
Half the invitations come to nothing. Not refused, yet time passes without them happening. ENFP lets go fast; INFP does not move.
Split into the one who widens and the one who stays, it runs; placed as equals, it stops.
How each sees the other
ENFP → INFP
This person has hold of what you cannot put into words.
But they do not move. The same story continues for years.
And in public they suddenly sulk.
INFP → ENFP
This person brings world after world.
On the other hand, they do not stay. Just as the talk gets deep, they have moved to another topic.
And in public they try to push their own way of feeling through. You go quiet.
What has been recorded
SCENE 01Adventure shared, emphasis unmatched
A note: "they share the wish for adventure. Beyond that, the emphasis of their talk does not match".
SCENE 02In front of a third party, the introvert withdraws
The observation common to extinguishment: alone it gets through, a third party enters and it becomes a competition, and the introverted side is first to turn warmth into formality.
SCENE 03I wish I hadn't confided
Both secretly regret it, and the topics thin out without either knowing what happened, the record says.
A pair on record
George Sand (IEE, inferred) × Frédéric Chopin (IEI)
Typing: Chopin established; Sand inferred
In 1838 the two set out for a winter on Majorca. Rain, illness, a derelict monastery, the hostility of the islanders. The shared adventure ended as badly as possible. Still it lasted nine years; Sand read Chopin a novel she had written about a sickly, jealous prince; and in the end it broke over the quarrel about her daughter Solange's marriage, in which Chopin took the daughter's side. They never met again, and Sand did not come to the funeral.
What matches: sharing only the taste for adventure, with the emphasis unmatched; breaking when a third party enters.
Love, living together, work, family: scene by scene
ConversationTalking deeply alone together is the best scene.
RomanceA good combination at the entrance. It stalls over when to move and when to let go.
Living togetherThings not getting decided becomes daily life.
WorkIt runs if you split into the one who widens and the one who stays.
FamilyA relation that is better the more distance there is.
If you keep going
Do not compare ways of feeling in public
It becomes a competition the moment a third person enters.
Do not make staying-or-moving the subject between you
The destination is ENFP's; the time after coming home is INFP's.
If it goes wrong, go back to just the two of you
What went wrong in public usually disappears when you talk alone.
For these two
How to meet ── Somewhere for just the two of you
A relation best alone together and awkward when people are added. One-on-one settings, a quiet café. Meet in a group and the good side is invisible.
Approach ── Keep third parties out
Do not talk about the two of you in front of others. Do not meet with friends along. Make the period of running side by side long, just the two of you.
A date ── A quiet place, just the two
A private room, the mountains, the city at dawn. The fewer people, the better. Talk, between you, about growing the same interest in different directions.
Gifts ── for ENFP, Comfort; for INFP, Deciding, and taking them along
For ENFP: Good food, something pleasant to the touch. The comfort ENFP does not arrange alone. For INFP: Less a thing than a date fixed and an outing. What INFP is waiting for is a force that pushes.
PROne thing for this relation
A relation that understands well and goes its own ways, so tools for time alone.
Because the feeling is the same and the emphasis differs.
INFP suddenly sulks
The introverted side takes distance first. Usually after ENFP has changed the subject in public.
I cannot explain why we parted
Because there was no fight. Half the invitations came to nothing, the topics thinned, and the excuse to meet vanished.
What is ENFP and INFP compatibility in love?
A good combination at the entrance. It stalls over when to move and when to let go. More under "Love, living together, work, family: scene by scene" and "If you keep going".
Do ENFP and INFP work well together?
It runs if you split into the one who widens and the one who stays. More under "Love, living together, work, family: scene by scene" and "If you keep going".
This pair is the extinguishment relation, one of the sixteen. How the relation itself arises, and how to tell it from the others, is on the relation page.
The two Model A's: what talks to what
ENFP on the left, INFP on the right. Each shows where the eight elements sit; lines connect the same element. Where each line starts and ends decides what happens in this relation.
Lines connect the same element in the other person's structure. 1–2 (strong) 3 (role) 4 (vulnerable) 5–6 (wanted) 7–8 (capable, indifferent)
1 → 7NeENFP's 1 (leading) Ne (extraverted intuition) sits in INFP's position 7 (ignoring). INFP can do what ENFP is good at but does not value it. ENFP feels slightly unappreciated.
2 → 8FiENFP's 2 (creative) Fi (introverted ethics) sits in INFP's position 8 (demonstrative). INFP can do what ENFP is good at but does not value it. ENFP feels slightly unappreciated.
3 → 5SeENFP's 3 (role) Se (extraverted sensing) sits in INFP's position 5 (suggestive). ENFP is weak here and INFP wants it. A gap neither can fill.
4 → 6TiENFP's 4 (vulnerable) Ti (introverted logic) sits in INFP's position 6 (mobilizing). ENFP is weak here and INFP wants it. A gap neither can fill.
5 → 3SiENFP's 5 (suggestive) Si (introverted sensing) sits in INFP's position 3 (role). What ENFP asks for is INFP's weakest point. The more ENFP asks, the smaller INFP gets.
6 → 4TeENFP's 6 (mobilizing) Te (extraverted logic) sits in INFP's position 4 (vulnerable). What ENFP asks for is INFP's weakest point. The more ENFP asks, the smaller INFP gets.
7 → 1NiENFP's 7 (ignoring) Ni (introverted intuition) sits in INFP's position 1 (leading). INFP's main field is one ENFP does not care about. Little friction, little interest.
8 → 2FeENFP's 8 (demonstrative) Fe (extraverted ethics) sits in INFP's position 2 (creative). INFP's main field is one ENFP does not care about. Little friction, little interest.