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a pair in the sixteen relations

ISFJ×ISFJ

ESI × ESI

Identity

Half a sentence, and it gets through.

Half a sentence, and it gets through. Someone who sees people by the same ethics. But each yields, then regrets it.

ISFJ and ISFJ compatibility in brief (love, work, friendship)

ISFJ × ISFJ is the Identity relation, one of the sixteen. Half a sentence, and it gets through.

LoveYou enter the cycle of yielding and regretting.WorkDo not compete for the same post.Friends & conversationTalk about people gets through.

Written as ISFJ × ISFJ it is the same pair. In 16Personalities terms, the Defender and the Defender.

No explanation needed

Interesting and pleasant at first. They seem reserved, cold and distant, but one's warmth melts the ice. There is a feeling that the other reads your thoughts.

In terms of the mechanism, the "ethics that reads distance between people" in ISFJ's first position and the "force that pushes and takes" in the second sit in exactly the same positions in the other. The view you are best at, the other is best at too. So no explanation is needed, and so no new perspective comes from the other either. The strong places overlap, and do not double.

In the old observations, in identity the same elements of both act in the same positions, and a complete, painless repulsion arises. Since no words are needed, there is also nothing the other can hand you. For these two, future possibilities and practical logic are absent on both sides.

The observation says both yield on principle, regret the yielding, and harden to recover what they lost.

Where identity is most useful is in learning. If a senior of the same type has walked the same road ahead of you, their experience can be used as it is. The observations too say repeatedly that it lasts long as mentor and pupil or with a difference in age. Only when two equal ISFJs do the same thing in the same place does the repulsion described above arise.

The more you yield, the more you regret; the more you regret, the harder you become.

Unable to live as equals

Living in the same house as equals is very difficult. Each imposes their own tastes, habits and standards as objectively rational. Yield, regret, recover, direct confrontation. Finally one becomes openly authoritarian and the other refuses to submit.

The empty places are the same too. The "practical logic" ISFJ wants most is what the other wants most, and neither has it. The "intuition that calculates ahead", which each produces with a little effort, takes a little effort from both. What flows in silently between duals never flowed between these two in the first place.

The same anxiety about the future creates a spiral of anxiety.

Retreating to a safe distance, they keep the distance as respect and consideration for each other. Reunions are left to chance. Easy joy brings the two closer; unexpected hardship pulls them apart.

How each sees the other

ISFJ → ISFJ

They read your thoughts.

They see people by the same ethics.

The warmth gets through.

ISFJ → ISFJ

They impose their own standards as rational.

After yielding, they harden.

When hardship comes, they drift away.

What has been recorded

Love, living together, work, family: scene by scene

ConversationTalk about people gets through.
RomanceYou enter the cycle of yielding and regretting.
Living togetherLiving together as equals is very difficult, the source says.
WorkDo not compete for the same post.
FamilyIt continues at a safe distance.

If you keep going

Do not yield
You harden trying to recover what you yielded.
Do not impose standards
Both think their own standards are rational.
Get in touch in hardship
Hardship pulling the two apart is the observed form.

For these two

How to meet ── Deep inside the same hobby
A relation needing no explanation. Specialist gatherings, fans of the same author, the same sport. The person it got through to at once: that is the one.
Approach ── Connect through what is interesting
The bond between these two is interest alone. Interesting talk over talk of daily life. It ends when the interest ends, so keep the interest alive.
A date ── The same thing, side by side
A day of doing the same hobby side by side. The care of daily life comes from neither, so eat out.
Gifts ── same type; for both, Something useful
A practical tool, something that saves effort. What ISFJ is waiting for is practical help. What you would be glad to receive is exactly right for the other. But you easily give each other the same thing on the same day, so hand it over first, or shift it a little.

PROne thing for this relation

A relation that gets through from half a sentence, so experiences needing no explanation.

Frequently asked

We lost our jobs and lost contact
The recorded pattern. Ethics forbids worrying the other.
My partner suddenly hardened
Recovering what they yielded.
It is tiring, like looking at myself
A feature of identity.
What is ISFJ and ISFJ compatibility in love?
You enter the cycle of yielding and regretting. More under "Love, living together, work, family: scene by scene" and "If you keep going".
Do ISFJ and ISFJ work well together?
Do not compete for the same post. More under "Love, living together, work, family: scene by scene" and "If you keep going".

This pair is the identity relation, one of the sixteen. How the relation itself arises, and how to tell it from the others, is on the relation page.

The two Model A's: what talks to what

ISFJ on the left, ISFJ on the right. Each shows where the eight elements sit; lines connect the same element. Where each line starts and ends decides what happens in this relation.

ISFJ · ESIISFJ · ESIEGO1 leadingFiintroverted ethics2 creativeSeextraverted sensingSUPER-EGO4 vulnerableNeextraverted intuition3 roleTiintroverted logicSUPER-ID6 mobilizingNiintroverted intuition5 suggestiveTeextraverted logicID8 demonstrativeSiintroverted sensing7 ignoringFeextraverted ethics1 leadingFiintroverted ethics2 creativeSeextraverted sensing4 vulnerableNeextraverted intuition3 roleTiintroverted logic6 mobilizingNiintroverted intuition5 suggestiveTeextraverted logic8 demonstrativeSiintroverted sensing7 ignoringFeextraverted ethics

Lines connect the same element in the other person's structure. 1–2 (strong) 3 (role) 4 (vulnerable) 5–6 (wanted) 7–8 (capable, indifferent)

1 → 1FiISFJ's 1 (leading) Fi (introverted ethics) sits in ISFJ's position 1 (leading). Both strong here. Same ground: fast understanding, and some rivalry.
2 → 2SeISFJ's 2 (creative) Se (extraverted sensing) sits in ISFJ's position 2 (creative). Both strong here. Same ground: fast understanding, and some rivalry.
3 → 3TiISFJ's 3 (role) Ti (introverted logic) sits in ISFJ's position 3 (role). Both weak. The same thing goes wrong for both.
4 → 4NeISFJ's 4 (vulnerable) Ne (extraverted intuition) sits in ISFJ's position 4 (vulnerable). Both weak. The same thing goes wrong for both.
7 → 7FeISFJ's 7 (ignoring) Fe (extraverted ethics) sits in ISFJ's position 7 (ignoring). Both capable, both indifferent. Left alone.
8 → 8SiISFJ's 8 (demonstrative) Si (introverted sensing) sits in ISFJ's position 8 (demonstrative). Both capable, both indifferent. Left alone.

Other pairs in the «Identity»

This page is also available in Japanese: ISFJ と ISFJ の相性. Русская версия: ISFJ × ISFJ.

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